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GG International School, Pune

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CHOOSE YOUR WORDS WELL

Raising children is no easy task. While it is interesting to talk to them, delve into their thoughts and see the world from their perspective, it is pretty difficult to find the right words and phrases to communicate with them. There are situations, which are challenging and overwhelming. We tend to lose control ourselves. However, it is imperative that we choose our words carefully while communicating with our children. What we say and how we say, leave a lasting impression on them and influence their growing up. Using a few powerful parenting phrases at difficult moments can really help you turn the situation into a win-win one.



Let us imagine a situation where your child might be in a complaining mode. It might not be something serious for us, but might just be of utmost importance from his/her perspective. A simple “that must have been hard” gives them the confidence that you are being attentive and you do care. You would find them go back to normal behaviour within moments. If you find them upset or emotional, however flimsy the reason be, a hug works wonders.


Then arise situations when your children ask for something they can’t have or do something they are not expected to do. Instead of a curt “no” or a yelling, try using, “that doesn’t work for me”. If you yourself feel out of sorts because of the situation, take five minutes to regroup and talk to them after that. That would give them time to calm down too. If you feel that you are running to a dead end, try “let’s start over”. That works well most of the time.



Another difficulty all parents face regularly is to make their children follow discipline. Instead of issuing orders, try discussing with them about how to make it work. Ask them how you can help them to make it happen. In case they come up with an alternative solution, show that you trust their judgement and wait for the consequences. This makes them feel responsible and ends up showing results.


We also need to teach our children how to accept success and failure. If they are achieving all their goals, instead of saying how smart they are, appreciate their efforts and diligence. In case they do not come out successful, ask them what would they do differently next time. If they are facing problems, instead of providing ready solution, ask them how they would like to address it, what the steps would be. This engages them in critical thinking.


Last, but not the least, you need to make your children feel loved and protected. Share with them how you love their company and how their loving gestures make you feel special. Assure them of your love, no matter what happens. This builds their confidence and makes them grow up to confident adults.



These few phrases are extremely powerful and help every parent in communicating with children. Use them often to raise your children to confident and responsible adults.

It’s time we gave them wings

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